Therapy Thoughts with Lindsay: Episode 63 - Relationship Communication & The 4 Agreements
Episode 63
It is Episode 63 of Therapy Thoughts with Lindsay, and today we are talking about The 4 Agreements and how to use them to improve your relationship communication. I have included more information below about these agreement and I would love for you to share in the comments how they show up in your life.
Episode 63 Audio
Episode 63 Video
The 4 Agreements
I love the book by Don Miguel Ruiz, The 4 Agreements. In my private practice, I use these agreements as a foundation to help couples stay on the right track or reset when needed. They are simple agreements to make, but they are not necessarily easy to keep. These agreements are not meant to be used a way to judge one another or hold each other emotionally hostage, but rather they are intended to help create a foundation for success
The 4 Agreements
Be Impeccable with Your Word
Don’t Take Things Personally
Don’t Make Assumptions
Always Do Your Best
Don Miguel Ruiz is the author of The 4 Agreements, and I highly recommend his book if you’d like to dive deeper into them. There is also a 3-book boxed set available that digs even deeper in the agreements and also offers insight into the 5th agreement. I’ll have to write more about this topic soon, as it has become such an integral part of my work with individual and relationship clients.
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Be Impeccable with Your Word
Speak with Integrity
Say only what you mean
Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others
Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love
Don’t Take Things Personally
Nothing other do is because of you
What others say and do is a projection of their own reality
When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering
Don’t Make Assumptions
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want
Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness, and drama
With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
Always Do Your Best
Your best is going to change from moment to moment. It will be different when you are healthy as opposed to when you are sick
Under any circumstances, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse and regret.
